A little peace of mind goes a long way. I could do anything I wanted now. I could go back to college or I could hitchhike back to Albuquerque where I had probably unwittingly been contacted by spirit jesters when rubbing elbows with strangers who enlisted in the University of New Mexico DMT experiments of that time.
I must’ve had a contact high.
After mental illness I’ve learned you have to have the experience to really know what the experience is like. In my case I had the experience of going places where I was entrusted by myself to disrupt nature with the reality of a solid ego and an unreal connection to entertainment by combining nature with sights and sounds that are a part of this world as it was then, also how it was before technology and where it’s headed when technology meets the Stone Age after it fails to separate entertainment from nature.
Our brains are nature while our thumbs have become tickets to the experiment of artificial experience. To have contact with nature is the only true entertainment.
I opted for college. I graduated. Now I work outside of my degree in maintenance while raising a family, the focus of my existence.
For the whole family, for everybody really, the struggle to minimize our contact with artificial experience as entertainment is bewildering. Entertainment is for enjoyment but when entertainment becomes artificial it lacks meaning and is a derivative of our own lives. It is no longer exceptional. Entertainment becomes a habit or routine and envelopes our lives instead of being a disruption from the norm. We begin to live for entertainment. Entertainment becomes our solid ego, disrupting nature when making contact through technology instead of through real people.
Real people must be the solution to avoiding artificial experience as entertainment. Making contact with real people. Everyday ordinary people that we rub elbows with every single day. People that get us through the day with the information we need to navigate our solid ego through nature.
That could be it. That is something I can teach my kids. I can teach them the difference between entertainment and information. That entertainment could make you crazy while information will set you free.
Had I chosen Albuquerque years ago the outcome would’ve been different. Maybe I would’ve started recovery and writing a lot sooner. The spirit of Albuquerque is not really far away though. I’ve made some good choices in my life.
Francis Erich McElroy 